Graduation Survival Tips For The First-Timer

My daughter graduated high school this weekend.

I survived.

Honestly, up until Sunday, I was a ball of nerves, as well as a well of emotions. How would I feel, now that my baby was leaving everything from public school behind? How would I feel, telling people that I had a high school graduate in my family? Would I feel saddened by the loss of being so incredibly involved in her life? Would I miss my friends that I made over the years? Would I miss those kids that grew up with my daughter, and would I miss the whole public school environment, with the multiple concerts, back to school nights, softball games, homecoming, and all of the fanfare that went with it?

Whenever I thought about Sunday, and even Prom Friday, my eyes would well up, and I would think, “I can’t believe that it’s almost over!” I don’t know how many of you felt the same way, but I wanted to put the brakes on time, in order to stop the day from coming. Whenever I passed the school, I’d think to myself, “It’s still her school…she’s still a student there.” Even when exams were over, and we were waiting anxiously for graduation day, I kept thinking, “It’s still her school…”

When Prom Friday arrived, I found myself in a blur of nail appointments, hair appointments, makeup application, and purchasing last minute items for the big night. I didn’t have time to think, “Wow, this is it, it’s really here - my daughter is going to the Senior Prom!” No, I was caught up in the fun of the day, and I was in the moment, and that’s exactly where I belonged. I was snapping off photos, entertaining parents, making black bean dip that rocked, and making sure that all of the kids had water. I couldn’t think about the day or what it represented - all I could think about was how gorgeous my daughter looked, how beautiful the other girls looked, how handsome the guys looked, and how much fun they were going to have that night, when the limo would speed them away to the Crest Hollow.

When it was all over, including after-prom, I wasn’t sad at all. I was actually thrilled, because my daughter had endured yet another rite of passage, and she had thoroughly enjoyed herself. I enjoyed myself, too, because I was a part of it, and it totally rocked!

When Graduation Sunday followed, two days later, I was too busy with making sure the flowers were obtained, the cake was purchased, the balloons were picked up, and all of the favors were packed up and ready to go. I made sure I had plenty of room on the memory card for photos and video, and I made sure I dressed appropriately, because spending time out on those bleachers was akin to walking on the sun. Well, not really, but you get the picture.

The only time I actually cried was when the graduates filed onto the football field to “Pomp and Circumstance”. I heard my friend behind me begin to sniffle, and that was what did me in. I was actually not even able to stop the flow of tears, because I was too busy viewing their entrance through a camera lens. When I finally caught a glimpse of my daughter, I thought I’d break down in tears, but actually, my heart swelled with pride. It was one of those moments that you have to truly experience to understand.

I watched as the graduates, especially my daughter, fidgeted in their seats as the honored speakers made their speeches. Nobody wants to listen to a lengthy prose on the day of their graduation; most kids are pretty much set on grabbing their diplomas and cutting out as quickly as possible. It was hot on that field, and to wear a graduation gown must have been even hotter. I know I was sweltering in the stands. Thankfully, nobody really had a lengthy speech, and Rep. Steve Israel was actually rather witty with his speech about children from Northport who told him to shorten his wordage. It must have made an impression, because his speech was literally no more than five minutes.

When the diplomas were handed out, I thought I’d get all misty and teary as my daughter’s row was called up, and she began the ascent to the podium. Instead, I must have been the loudest one in the stands, stomping my feet and screaming until I got dizzy. Really. I made my throat quite raw from screaming, “Yeah, BreeBree! You go!!” When your kid does something phenomenal, you don’t really care what you look like or sound like. You just know that you’re cheering for the greatest thing that ever happened to you, and you just want them to know that you’re their biggest fan.

After the ceremony was over, I was actually relieved. The stress and buildup to the day was finally over, and I realized that I’d still see my friends. I’d still keep in touch with them via Facebook, or text, or telephone. I wouldn’t be a part of the PTA or Booster Club or anything like that anymore, but I was actually relieved to give that part of my life up. I began to think, with great anticipation and joy, about the fall, the future, and what lies ahead for my daughter. And I was also thinking about the graduation party that would follow, and all of the fun we were going to have there, celebrating with family and friends.

And so, let me give you a few tips on surviving a graduation. First and foremost, stay in the moment. If you drift off to the past, you are sure to miss the glory of what’s going on right now. If you drift into the future, the same thing is going to happen. So stay focused in the present, and enjoy every single thing that’s happening. Cheer your kid on, stomp your feet, do something incredibly crazy, because your kid is going to love it. Believe me, the look on my daughter’s face was priceless. Second, make sure you do all of your planning and do your homework…get it done ahead of time, so you don’t have to sit and worry about what you have to do. Make a list, tick things off as you go, and stick to the list. Don’t worry about what doesn’t get done; if you can’t get it done, it wasn’t meant. And last, but certainly not least, bring your tissues, and enjoy everything. It’s one of the most thrilling, rewarding, happy, bittersweet moment of your life, and one that you will never forget.